Crystalline Hope

Hello.

So, what to say? You must be getting sick of my excuses as to why I haven't written something in a long time. Basically, out of laziness. As always.

I guess I've gotten into life a bit more? Like, I actually stand a chance to find a job sometime soon again, I started doing my driver's license and I'm generally more active in life. Do I feel more happy? Not really.

My entire life feels even worse than usually, of course that might also come from certain other things happening in my life. I've deleted Lena, for like, the second time. It hurts, a lot, but I'm sure it's the best for us. I hurt her, and she hurts me, and in the long run it's better for us to stay away from each other, I think. She's still really important to me, aside from everyone bashing on her. She's not a bad person, despite what some people might think about her, and I'm still happy for the time I was able to spend with her. But aside from that? I feel like I've lost everything online. I still talk to people, it's not that, but I can't connect with Miro like I used to. We had a big fight, and recently he just bought me a Christmas Present which I wasn't expecting, so we kind of talked again. I still think it's best if everyone just stays far, far away from me. So far I've hurt EVERY person I've had contact with sooner or later. I'm not kidding. I am also not trying to sound like some impossible alien life form, I'm merely stating a true fact. I'm an asshole, I'm selfish, I'm a pessimist, I'm depressed like 24/7. I'm not special, I don't have any talents, I can't draw, I can't sing, I don't look very good, decent if anything. I guess you can say I write well, and I write a lot, and I have a lot of imagination when writing things and I could quite possibly write you thousands of stories if I would get the actual motivation to put things into motion, but that's exactly what isn't happening. I've started writing a story, but that's it. I don't actually finish it, and I suppose I will never do that, all these ideas in my head, all these possibilities, possible outcomes, anything really that's just racing and stirring inside my head every ever lasting second of my miserable yet incredibly enduring existence on this very planet you're all right now, this very moment, spending your lives upon. Did you read the last sentence? Were you able to fully comprehend the capacity of my rambling? Things like that just pop out of my mind like fireworks at New Year's. And I can't write it down, I can't, I try, but I don't have the power nor the will to actually do it.

But all this moaning aside, it's not the worst thing that's troubling my mind as of late. I'm speaking about the birthday of my mother, which was this week. She celebrated today, was all quite jolly and great, but I was just so depressed about everything that's happened in my life that I started getting severe headaches when we were at our neighbor's. They've asked, yeah, I told them my head was in pain. Of course I did not mention it was of all the sadness that's been streaming through my thoughts the last couple of weeks. So after a while they suggest to maybe relocate some dislocated bones or some shit to make it stop. A very clever tactic, and I suppose it would've worked, if my head wasn't in pain because of something else. So I said: "No, it's fine." and a friend of my mother said "Oh come on, just let me do it." - "No, leave me alone." - "It will only take like a second." - "JUST LEAVE ME ALONE." And then I left.

I don't want to think about what their impression was, they're all still somewhat strangers, and I've probably left the worst kind of impression I could've possibly left. I went home and, yeah, I wasn't exactly feeling good about it either. I'm not sure how I will face them again. Actually, I just want to be alone. Not really, but yeah. I am lonely, but this is good, right? No it's not, but it's the best. Ugh.

I've watched a lot of Doctor Who, which is probably the best series I've ever watched in my entire human life. It gets a lot of extra points because I can relate to the Doctor and his pain. You should all really give it a try. I haven't watched any anime, although I plan on finishing Bakemonogatari once I'm up to date with Doctor Who.

In all my misery, I've got to say, though, I met quite a lot of nice people again. Some old friends, some just some strangers I've finally gotten closer to. I don't know what I should make of it, but I'll try to spend more time with them and perhaps live a little again. Probably won't do me any good, but what can I do.

I haven't stopped caring, I wish I would, it takes away the pain, but it's hard to stop caring. So I just bid you adieu again, hope you're all alive and kicking and hopefully not as disgusted at life as I currently am. You take care of yourselves.

Just so nobody can say my music is what makes me depressive, this is what I listen to:

Merry New Christmas Year!

Just so much fucking to tell, so little time. I'm so terribly sorry, but it just seems like I'm getting more and more lazy the longer I'm owning this blog. Maybe it's also the fact that the design is slowly but steadily getting lame, and I'm oh so craving to open up another blog. But if I did, what would happen to all of this? Would anybody ever still bother reading my past? I doubt it.

So yeah Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year or something, I don't really care for any of it, my Christmas I spent with Lena (Which I visited, yeah) and New Year's eve was basically just me and Miro (Yes we're pals or something again, not sure if I mentioned this) farming cooking recipes for a World of Warcraft achievement (Yes I picked up playing that again).

Oh, and yeah, Lena and I broke up. It may not be the happiest thing to talk about, but we did it in good ways, in person and are still being very friendly towards each other, so no harm done. Nonetheless I still cry sometimes, and I do miss her and the old times, but this is probably the best course of action.

I'm being perfectly honest guys I have no fucking idea what I did during the time I did not talk to you. I think I played the same games as usual, maybe a bit of Telltale's Jurassic Park, and generally showed Lena a lot of games while I was at her place. And yeah, I played a lot of World of Warcraft. I don't think there's anything really to go into detail with, I'm sure you know the usual games I play, League of Legends and shit, and WoW is not really a very unknown game (Although it's being judged quite harsh by most people). When I was at her place we did lots of shit, but nothing important, mainly I really just sat at her laptop and played, you'd think we are a weird couple, we even played an eroge together, but spending time with her was really fun in general. We did visit the winter market once, met up with a friend of her who's also sort of an Otaku, it was fun talking and she also knew about Touhou and Homestuck, and apparently is a lolicon as well! It was cool and all, but I didn't really talk to her after that again, even to this day, I mean I have her on MSN, I haven't spoken a word to her at all. The neighborhood Lena's grandparents live in had a really Tranquility Lane like feeling from Fallout 3. Everything was peachy, everything even looked the same. She made a few pictures, maybe I'll post them sometime on Twitter.

Animes, well, as a matter of fact I did watch a few episodes of Higurashi no Naku Koro ni at Lena's place, she didn't watch it yet, and it seemed like a fun idea to do. Other than that, a big no go, but I've gotten more determined to finally work down my endless of animes I still have to watch, and the one I'll probably watch the most is Mirai Nikki. But for now I'm still way too preoccupied with watching all new seasons of Doctor Who (Which, in case I haven't mentioned it yet, is probably one of the most amazing series I have ever watched in my entire life), and since each episode features 40(!) minutes, and it has, I think 5 or 6 seasons, each featuring 14 episodes, that makes about 2800 minutes, meaning 46 hours, meaning almost two days of playtime. A long series.

Yeah, I don't know what else happened, talked a bit to Shade again, which I'm glad for, made a new streaming group Steam, which looks pretty cool, started playing some weird eroge I found, it was in English, and yeah that's all there is to say so far, folks.

Here's a random video of something I like:


I hope you've all really enjoyed your holidays, see you next time.

That wretched life of mine

Hey, y'all.

It's been a long time since my last post. How have you all been? I sure hope you've been alright.

I haven't.

There's actually happened so much stuff between that I'm having a very hard time thinking back. I'll have to reread my last post to see what I've already said and what I haven't, but later.

I'm close to actually getting a job soon, but that still stands in the stars, I haven't heard anything new and at "work" it's also just been a constant sitting around, doing nothing. I've had really bad headaches today, tension headaches, which lead to the fact that I have now an appointment at a neurologist. Well at least my constant cold seems to have neutralized itself.

I've played quite some games, I guess. I can't remember. I think Sequence, Sonic Generations and L.A. Noire. Aside from Skyrim of course. Sequence is a pretty cool, very original role playing rythm game, you should check it out, costs less than 5 Dollars as far as I know. Sonic Generations is probably as of now the most hyped Sonic game ever, and with good reason. Not only is it incredibly fun like any other Sonic game up until now, it even features the reworked older 2D Sonic maps which many have been missing. I really liked it. And for L.A. Noire I have waited almost half a year, since it wasn't released on PC. But now that it is, it's great, amazing, and fun, but I haven't finished it because Skyrim got in the way. Skyrim is probably the longest role-playing game I have ever played in my entire life. I think it's safe to say I have spent more than 72 hours (!) into it and I haven't finished all side- nor the main quests. It's incredibly addicting and but it isn't repetitive at all since there's so much quests, and not just "Be a dear and go fetch me 20 wolf pelts", no, actual fully scripted side quests that feel more fulfilling than the main quest at some points. But not to get too much into it, I'm sure it's hyped enough already, and I'm just saying you all should check it out.

I've finally finished Nichijou a few hours ago. It feels good to finally have that behind me, but now I'll have a problem deciding which anime to start and finish again. Also I've finally finished Homestuck, but that was also weeks ago. I'm still in love with it as I've always been, it's simply the greatest story I have ever experienced, nothing that I've read or seen was quite like it. I don't mean to convert anyone of you, since I've already tried that, but you should, and by that I really mean should, at least read Act 1 of it before you even dare to judge it. Act 6 has just started a while ago and the hype just doesn't stop. Everyday I feel myself thrilled in awaiting of the next page.

Since I'm such a big fan, though, I'll let you have a shorter trailer, and not 13 minutes like the last one.



Now, to my life I guess. I've recently had a bad fight with Shade and after that with Sam, which lead to the fact that both of them deleted and blocked me for good now. Why? Well it's a little awkward discussing that in the open, especially since it might very well be misunderstood by a great many of you, but let's get down to business. Mirodir has a girlfriend, or has had one, I'm not sure if they are together anymore, but let's start there. Mirodir has always been my best friend, and by that, I mean that we both care for each other. Now, his girlfriend is no good for him, I think I've told him that, and I think he may know that, but yet he stays like a loyal dog out of the sewers and worships her. In the past, she's already broken his trust, I think more than once but I'm a little vague on that, however it was clear that this can not be a lasting relationship. So when I had the chance to talk to her, I became to know her. Let's just say I wasn't exactly overwhelmed by her intellect, but aside from that, I guess she was nice to talk to. It was that time when I had the idea of testing her faith by flirting with her, of course I had no real interest since I have a loving girlfriend already, but she of course did not know that, and didn't exactly say no right off the bat. One thing came to the other, we talked some more, she said she'd think about it and the night ended. Now, I would've told my girlfriend as well as Mirodir about the plan of this, but both were already offline. So the next say, I'd say shit exploded. She told Mirodir about this, of course Mirodir didn't believe me when I said I was just testing her (Although he did say he believes me but he didn't act the part), and my girlfriend was utterly shattered about the fact that I didn't tell her about this (But as I've said I would've, but was unable to). So we had a big fight, all of us, Sam talked to me when I flipped out and went offline, she was curious so she asked my girlfriend, girlfriend tells Sam the story, Sam tells the story Shade. I'm but all too sure that during this happy mail delivery a few details may have gone missing, which also explained why Shade flipped her shit at me when I made a joke at her (That joke being "You sure have a lot of money" when she played Skyrim right at the release). So we fought, and I guess I bitched back when she bitched at me about this whole situation, and since the past between me and Shade wasn't all too rosy, she said "Fuck this" and blocked me (Later stating I do not deserve another chance when I talked to friends to ask her how she's faring) but alright, continuing. So I was mad, and went ahead and bitched at Sam for telling Shade, which led to Sam being pissed off and blocking me as well. So I went to another friend of them, which I actually got to know more than I had, namely Dale, out of confusion I may have accidently stirred shit up some more, and Dale blocked me as well. Later on, Miro still couldn't shut the fuck up about the matter with his girlfriend towards my girlfriend saying things like (Hurr hurr Rio is such a bad friend don't you want to see the log) when I've already pasted her the entire log of Skype (The log he had was of Chatango, which quite honestly, didn't exactly change the whole thing) so me and my girlfriend fought because I said that I hate how Miro can't shut up, so out of anger at Mirodir for yet again causing fights between me and my girlfriend (Yes we'll all remember the posts I have made about this with my past relationship, it's all in this blog), I went ahead and got rid off Miro, in all messengers I could think of. Now that I think about it I may have forgotten about Skype, I'll check on it later.

So there you have it, that's the story that's happened, that's what's been driving me insane the last week, because as you all know, Shade was a very important friend of mine, and it really hurt losing her. Sam was a pretty good friend as well, but with her I can at least understand it because I wasn't nice to her as of late.

I'm not sure what I'll do exactly, I'm still left to wait. I haven't given up on them, but I understand it'll take time more than anything. I'll have to rework the banners on the side as well, but that can wait. Kumiko has a blog now, and I'd like Dale to get more attention once we've resolved the issue, so a complete list of links will probably be Shade, Dale, Kumiko, Sam and my girlfriend. But, again, that requires us all to hang out again, as well as a little thought on the matter.

Suppose that's all I have for now, I'll let you know if anything urgent comes up. Until then, stay sharp.

The improbability of the probable.

I oughta learn to make titles. I swear everytime I go and write a blog post I sit at least 10 minutes in front of the white box, thinking "What the fuck do I name this thing?"

So, hello everyone. It has been a long time since we last had the chance to talk. How have you guys been holding up? Everything going alright? I sure as hell hope so!

My life's been a constant up and down as always, now that I'm in a relationship even more so since we constantly fight about the smallest of things, it's so silly! But we always make up in the end and as long as I know that I can make her smile, I don't care about any other detail. So Lena was here two weeks ago (Heck, has it been that long ago already? What was I doing last week?!), and we had tons of fun. We also had just as much drama, that be said, but it was totally worth it. With her arrival, Dungeon Defenders came out as well, so when we bought it, we played it. And when I say played it I mean we appropriately played the fuck out of this game and no blood nor sweat could bring up apart from leveling like we didn't know any other task in life.
It was really fun.

I'm not about to go into detail as to what Dungeon Defenders is about, just check out this here game trailer I found while browsing the internet and check it out. I love it, she loves it, and I've been playing it for weeks now!



Moving on, a bunch of stuff has happened. I wrote countless applications during my stay at "work", looking for mostly restaurant and hotel related jobs as the people who know me on Twitter already know. Now, it's not exactly what I was dreaming about, but it looked okay, I guess. The problem was, there's constant pressure from where I go to "work", and they, obviously, want me to get a move on regarding this issue. I feel like I'm constantly changing choices where and as what I want to work as. Just now recently, after doing one of those job tests I found out that mechatronic technician is a job which doesn't look bad either. Lucky for me, my mom knows a guy who works for probably the most advanced and well known company which is looking for apprentices. And they're even looking for chemical lab assistants, which was, as most of you know, the job I was first looking for. This might be the end of my long quest to find a job. Or, as always, just another dead end in the path I call life.

Oh well! I wasn't quite as active on Twitter and Tumblr these past weeks, as well as Blogger, and I'd like to apologize to all of those who have been more than eagerly awaiting my next post. I cannot promise it won't happen again, since it's always a motivational thing that's going on. It depends on my mood entirely. So even if I have nothing to say and am in the mood, I'll blog.

Uh, animes, right. Been watching some more Conan and Nichijou. Kind of have been neglecting Naruto since it's just filler after filler, and it's pissing me off. Hopefully that ends soon. I have been reading hundreds of pages of Homestuck and I am loving it so much. I have become one with the fandom, yet I have not fully reached its capacity. (And with that I mean I still haven't caught up with the newest pages.) To show off my fandome (and more importantly, convince more people to watch this series) I have a video here which I'd like all of you to see.



With that, I'm out. See y'all.

Celebrate Cerebration

I'm sick.

Or at least I was sick the entire last week, acute bronchitis the doctor said. I was pretty happy when he told me to stay home for a week, although I did NOT expect me to be seriously sick like I was. It's over, or at least mostly over now. Monday I'll probably go to work again, as long as nothing unforseen happens.

So anyhow, greetings my fellow followers. I've been thinking much about this blog, and the layout of the blog. I've been thinking about moving, as in, moving somewhere completely different, making a new blog, or rent a homepage to make a new name for myself. The Great Rio has died down, a long time ago, actually. What's I'm treating upon are the remains of a past that I can no longer call my actual life, and thus, no longer my actual blog. It feels weird, but it's true. When I started this, I WAS The Great Rio, I was overconfident to hide the fact that I was actually drowning in self-pity. Now, I'm Ryou Takeshi, a different person, much more mature, yet still childish, that side will probably always remain. I've talked to some sort of psychologist not too long ago, talked about my life, where I want to go with it. Talked about myself, talked about pressure, talked about how childish I often am. She said it's good though. She said it's a good thing to still have this inner child. I've never thought of it like that. I've always thought of it like a burden, like something I don't want to have, something that makes me less of what I want to be. But I guess I've come to accept it. I've come to accept who I am, come to terms with myself about a lot of things that have been troubling my mind for eternity.

Recently, Miro showed me an old post of mine, it was a year ago, or so, I've talked about people in my life, gave a general outlook for newcomers what I'm actually talking about, and what my life really is like. Unless you guys mind it, I'll just do that again right now.

Off goes, I guess. I'm Pascal Kammer, usually called Ryou Takeshi by almost everyone now, still nicknamed Rio, or Glam occasionally since the name "Ryou" isn't available everywhere. I'm currently 18 years old and I'm happily... can I say engaged? I don't know. I have a girlfriend I guess, with whom I'm really happy with. She's kind, good-hearted, a little clumsy here and there, we get in lots of fights and she doesn't appreciate herself. But she loves me more than anything else in this world, and that's why I treasure her more than anything else myself. Her name's Lena Feldmann, I'm just taking the liberty to tell her real name, she's nicknamed Panda, and mostly called this way online. She's 17 right now, beautiful in my eyes, although she never thinks so herself. She has a hard life, it's easy for me to relate to her since, I, too, have had a rough life myself. But moving on.

Miro, always the second one in the list, for this exception, of course. I don't know where to start here, and I've said this probably a million times already, but yeah. He's my best friend, that's what he'll always be. We sure do fight a lot, too, and some days, heck, even weeks sometimes, we don't spend much time at all anymore. But we do have time to sit down and talk eventually. Reflect about our lives. I'm an egocentric bitch, I'll tell you that, but one thing's for sure, I'm proud of him. He walked literally the same path, but unlike me, he got a hold of himself and is living a pretty damn good life. He's got a sure job, something that's fun for him, he makes tons of money and still finds time to hang out in the internet. I envy him a lot, and I feel like sometimes I do him wrong with that, since he worked hard for what he has, and, well I can't say I haven't worked hard either, but I probably haven't worked hard enough. Or I've just had bad luck, let the fates decide that. He knows how much of a jackass I can be, but he's also changed and can be pretty much an asshole, too. What's actually funny here is that I'm thinking that might be due to my influence, so I guess I can't complain there. You just do your thing, I'll be rooting for you or something. Just don't... mention this post alright?

Down the list, Slein. Well buddy, what do I say? We share a common bond, he's a good friend and we have great times together, although they're mostly in games rather than outside. But we've gotten closer the past months so I guess that's a start. He's still an awesome friend as always, I appreciate his existance, and I'm glad he's around. Life would be a lot more boring without him, and I'd say aside from Mirodir, and obviously my girlfriend, he's one of the key figures in my life.

I guess... it's your turn now, Shade. Heck, what do I even say there. I'm glad you found your love, and I deeply apologize again for all the trouble I've caused you about it, it's just been kind of rough for me there, too. Again, we've known each other for a long time and still keep contact, and that's an amazing thing since usually the people I treasure most, I kind of lose contact with. That doesn't mean I stop caring, just, yeah, it's sad. But for you, wow, look at you go. You've grown so much, you've changed a lot. When we first met you were, and I'm not joking there, an emotionless blob. And now? Man, you're so tsundere I can't even describe it. You're so full of life, so full of emotion. I'm still sorry what happened between us, I screwed up, you know me. But it's helped you a lot, at least the time before and after that, and maybe the good things that have happened between us. I hope you and Sam are happy together.

Now, here's where my list, actually, kind of ends. I know... hundreds of other people I could name here, and would end up forgetting someone. I'll still just faintly name some of the people I enjoy my everyday life as for now.

Timmy, heck, I don't even know the rest of your name right now. You get me so mad sometimes, and I just hate you then, but in all actuality, you're a fine guy, you're fun, cool to talk to, and yeah, that's pretty much all I can say about that. You probably don't even read this blog.

Next on the list, again, this list is no ranking, it's just how they come to mind, is Albi. Yeah, girl. I don't know what to say here. We've kind of, sadly enough, outgrown each other a bit, and that makes me really sad. Maybe it's because you're not Steam, maybe it's because you're not Teamspeak, I can't tell, but I don't really talk to you at all anymore... I'll never forget our meeting, it sounds pretty weird and shit, but that day was magical. I had so much fun, and I've had deep feelings for you the most of my lifetime, but I can't change a person, nor can I change its thoughts. You didn't want more, and so it was. It was sad, I guess, I cried about it, too. But I've moved on, but I'm glad I've shared this experience with you. We should definitely get in touch again, someday. I won't forget you that easily.

I am so making this blogpost longer than I wanted to, sigh. I guess this one goes out for all my Twitter and Tumblr friends, who are not really friends, but more or less colleagues and acquaintances. Just a quick shout out for Füschlatz, who's a really cool guy and shares the love for Touhou just as I do. Also Hiroto Sumi, which is a really good friend whom I can trust and share interests with. As well as TsunTaiga, or for that fact, Jakka-Jon, who really got me into a great group of people in Skype and is generally a really cool person to hang out with. Paul, of course, who's an amazingly fun guy I really love to chat and talk to. And Myrhh, who I got to know and love playing League with, you're cool, too. And most importantly, Dreamcrytsall, who, frankly, I got to know years ago, but rebonded more or less in Twitter with. She's also the main person when it comes to retweeting the crap I say. And of course, a thanks to all my 91 followers as of now, you guys are awesome, I love that you like what I have to say. And as for Tumblr, I don't even know half of you guys, I just see that I reblog your stuff, and you reblog mine, so we're all cool. A big thanks to you, too.

I suppose that's that. That is one hell of a big text wall. I've been thinking of remaking my blog on Tumblr, and just linking everyone here to there, but then again, is that a good idea? I mean, I don't know. I'd love to hear your thoughts on this one, as I think it's really a big thing for me. Should I keep this blog? Should I rent a homepage and start a new? Or should I make a Tumblr account for my new blog appearance? Leave your thoughts in the shout, in the comments, or contact me privately.

So, just to finish this off because I've recently got really hooked into Touhou (On that note, I'm uploading my favorite Touhou themes to Tumblr almost daily), I guess I'll link another video, but this time not Touhou related, but the opening to my currently favorite anime of all time.


As well as one of the funniest scenes in the entire anime, it doesn't take long either.


Well, that's all from me, Nichijou is the best shit I've watched in a long time, hope you guys try it out. We'll see each other... I don't know, soon? No idea!

A generic scramble of life

Let me just make a quick list about the things I'll say before I forget them.

Minecraft, League of Legends, Puella Magi Madoka Magica, Twitter, Tumblr, Real life.

Or something.


So anywho, greetings, it's been a long time and I still don't feel like typing a post, but when I think about how long it's been it just makes me sort of sad because I do want to keep you updated but on the other hand I think "Oh what's the point." That is also my general outlook on life.
But more on that later.

So I played Minecraft 1.8 Pre-release just the last few days, pretty neat, new features, cool, looks as awesome as ever and still gets boring as fast as always. I'm looking forward to 1.9, though, where they actually add NPCs.

LoL has always been a topic on my blog, I guess, well that's little to no surprise considering it's the game I play most. Riven is coming out tomorrow and Dominion was delayed YET ANOTHER TIME. Riot sure did its job crushing the hopes and dreams of their entire playerbase. Again.

On the note on games, I can't even list what I played. Did I mention Deus Ex: Human Revolution? Fuck, I think I didn't, man how long has it been already. It's an awesome game, very stealthy, yet allows you to decide if you're more of a friendly or more of an aggressive war-machine. The boss fights are plain stupid and ridiculous, except for the last one, which was, with all due respect, a fucking joke.

I feel like I should go into more detail about the games I play and the things I do because I personally think it's making my blog look really uninteresting. I mean I give no reviews, I don't talk much about the things, just casually mention them. I don't know, personally I find that sort of lame.

I also played Dead Island, you know, that new Zombie Survival game on a beach. Yeah it's cool, had some trouble getting the Multiplayer to work with some friends, will try to fix that to actually get into it, since all I've been doing is playing Singleplayer and that is sure to bore out after a while.

Twitter is also one of the best things ever happening to me, I've gotten so much into it, met so many new and nice people, I can discuss things, tell news, or just spout complete nonsense and at least someone is sure to read it and like it. I have amassed 85 followers by now, for me, that's a big leap that I was definetely not expecting to happen, or at least to happen this soon. I'm aiming for 100 this month, and the more I get, the easier it should be to gather more. I always was a very egocentric person as most of you already know, so it's a good feeling to see people being interested in me, I mean, literally seeing it. Here it's just "Yeah, uh, there were 40 people on your blog today" and I'm like "lolk" because I can't really control if those 40 gave a shit about what they saw here. With Twitter, they reply, they answer, they give their opinion, they hear my opinion, it's just a whole new level. I'm having a very similar experience with Tumblr, I've amassed a lot more followers, mainly through Twitter, and it's a good feeling to see people reblog stuff you've blogged, because it shows interest.

People may have noticed I have added a Twitter box and I have removed the Box.net playlist. Well the reason for Twitter is mighty obvious, as for Box.net, I became a tad scared about the legal rights, and about the problem with blogspot shutting this thing here down if they get a hold of it. So I'd rather just try to find something else instead of risking my entire blog.

So yeah, that "work" I go to everyday is as unfulfilling as always. I mean at least it helps me have a rythm in life, it helps me to become less lazy, helps me to hopefully find an interesting job for me. I've accepted my position in life, or at least I'm a lot more comfortable than I used to be now. I guess that's good or something. Met a bunch of new people, too. As in, real life people (Although I also met many online people, too), but what's more is, that those real life people actually are, at least partly, like me! I mean, they watch anime, some play games (Other than Counter Strike and World of Warcraft hurr durr, in actuality, League of Legends), and they understand and respect my general idea of life! Or at least they try!

I guess it's okay, for now. My life that is. Although we're still having money issues, the money I get from going to "work" really helps out as a backup safe. And I can actually buy stuff without having bad feelings about it! Although, still, I have to limit myself most of the time and pass.

Suddenly I also feel like I have so much to do and so less time. I mean there's Twitter, Tumblr, games, girlfriend, Skype, the internet, my story (which, admittedly, I haven't written on for ages, but I still think about it) and yeah, it's sort of hard to decide what I should do. I mean, spending time with Lena is a must, Twitter is very addicting and time-consuming, so I have to be careful when to use it, Tumblr is only useable when people posted stuff, Skype is literally just as time-consuming as Twitter as I'm in a chat which spams messages every now and then, and the internet is still a place I tend to enjoy lots. So usually what happens is that I play less. A lot less. Apparently, though. I don't know, life is still very dull, however not as dull as it used to be.

Hah! See! I just wanted to finish talking, so when I scrolled up to check the picture, I saw I still haven't mentioned Puella Magi Madoka Magica. Or Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magica, which... essentially means the very same. So I've watched it, yeah, and I have to say it's just as awesome as I always expected, moreso, it's one of the best animes I watched in a very long time. It's very brutal and the storyline is amazing, I'm currently stuck at episode 10 because I have this syndrome where I rarely watch once I near the end of an anime. It's so painful!

Also I have Katalasticism. Not diagnosed, however, pretty obvious for everyone to see. It mixes right in with my high amount of childish behaviour despite my age. Which, kind of makes me a little sad when I think about it. It's funny how you guys never experience any of that, unless you know me outside of this blog!

Also, a random music video because I feel like it.





Those are my two favorite themes of the new Touhou game, right after Mamizou, obviously. I also like Toyosatomimi's appearance, and I can't help but to imagine her as the nemesis of Youmu. (You know, both wield swords of all characters)

Oh well!

I guess that's all I have for today, I will really, really try to post more! Keep it up everyone, and I'll see you next time.

P.S. : The picture I used for this blog is from an amazing artist I found, which name I already forgot, but which I credited on Tumblr so you can scroll through my posts there to see more of him, that aside, expect to see more of him on this very blog! Or her, I don't know!

It's over 90000!

Alright! It's finally happened! Maybe due to me being derpy I haven't noticed earlier, but I've recently just hit 100000 views on my blog! That's amazing!

When I started out with my blog, I was pretty sure I'd be damn happy if a few 1000 were going to read this, but now look at all the way I've gone. Sure, I know that 50% of those opened this page for a second and closed it, and 25% haven't stayed longer than 5 minutes. Maybe another 15% scrolled down a few pages, but that leaves us with at least 10% of people who at least casually sometimes check my blog for updates and like to read it. And I like that.

I would give you a price, but theoretically you are just a number, and I wouldn't know what sort of price to give to such an occasion. A game? Music? Reviews? I don't know.


So anyways, Gamescom happened and my girlfriend went there, hope she's having a great time, I'd love to tag along but it's way too far for me, and I don't have the money to go there. She said she's bring me a souvenir, I found that cute. Riot Games is there currently, they gave out Nasus Riot K-9 skins on Twitter, and now here's the good part. Have I told you I won a Fullmetal Pantheon skin on Twitter recently? Twice? Yeah I gave one to Mirodir because he hasn't won any. Now guess what, I didn't get no Nasus skin, but Miro got two. Coincidence much?

Naturally I played Games, too. Namely Bastion and From Dust. Bastion is an amazing 2D hack 'n slay with a brilliant, breath-taking storyline. Let me just post you my absolute favorite track from the game.



When I heard that song ingame, I stopped moving and was blown away by the beauty of this game. Her voice is so amazing, and the moment when it played ingame... I have nothing to say to that. Listen, be amazed.

As for From Dust, it's a lot like Black and White, you play "God" but instead of manipulating objects, you manipulate the earth itself, you take sand, water and lava to form ground and solve different level puzzles to help your tribe survive and populate this world. It's pretty beautiful and unique, but the controls are a pain in the ass.

Other than that, I wouldn't know right. Hope you guys are doing fine. We'll see each other!